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great church family that we depended on," she said. "But sitting with other mothers and families I saw so many who didn't. So many needed help and were alone. Jay's Hope was birthed in the midst of that." Gaskins said after Jay's death she was angry with God. She told Him she wasn't talking to Him because He hadn't answered the biggest prayer of her life. She said, even so, she found God to be patient and felt His compassionate presence for herself and Jay. She said she began understanding His love for her and others in new ways, and that Jay had been granted a "heavenly healing if not an earthly one." She said she resolved to share hope and love with others in practical, sincere ways. "Truthfully, we started Jay's Hope in the midst of our battle," she said. "We made little care packages for others around us and bought gas cards for patients' families. And I knew there was nothing better than just being able to talk with someone who gets it, someone who's been there and knows It's meant more than anything having them calling, visiting, always asking if there's something they can do. Sickness isolates you, but I feel like I've gotten a good friend. Not feeling alone is such a big thing." Stile said even during the worst of COVID-19 there was never a resistance from Jay's Hope, but always a shoulder to cry on. If that added dimension can be called compassion and understanding, it has come to Jay's Hope the hard way. Begun in 2006 by Cindy Gaskins and her husband, Jason, their own nightmare-journey of losing their child, Jay, to Medulloblastoma led to Jay's Hope's creation and efforts to provide needed practical aid for young patients and their families in caring ways. "We got more bad news than good, and not a lot of hope," Gaskins said. "I eventually became adamant about not hearing percentages or statistics of my child's condition anymore. I said quit telling me and just do everything possible to save Jay. That's where the Bible verse Jay's Hope uses comes from: 'Against all hope, in hope we believe' (Romans 4:18)." The Gaskins know the heart- wrenching situation and the need for hope families have. "My momma's gut knew something wasn't right before Jay was diagnosed," Gaskins said. "At the doctor's office where we got the bad news, I went and locked myself in the bathroom crying. I had to leave the situation and let my husband ask all the questions. I was eight months pregnant, too. My husband came to the door asking, 'Cindy, are you OK? Will you come out?' It was just so hard." Travel, surgery and treatment at St. Jude's Children's Hospital meant long weeks in strange surroundings while the demands of a disrupted life continued back home with Jason and their other children. She said being separated was difficult but school, work, bills and other family activities went on. "We were a weekend family," she said. Jay eventually succumbed to cancer. They understand the un- understandable. "But we were blessed with a strong support team of family, friends and a Top: Cindy Gaskins, executive director and co-founder of Jay's Hope. Bottom: Families enjoy a '1980s Rewind'- themed fundraiser for Jay's Hope held at Fall Line Brewing in September. 92 maconmagazine.com | DECEMBER/JANUARY 2022